i wish i could be like Donnie Darko, i would go back in time and stop all of that from happening.
I would have never met you, I would have made sure you could have lived your childhood happy and without heartbreak. But; i would make sure that we would meet in the future, when i am more mature and over childish things. When i could really love you, because trust me.. i really could. This could work, I could make this happen.. we could make this happen. I am still in love with you, and the funny thing is while we were together i could never get myself to say it.. and i didnt even feel it. But now that i have lived more i know that i am so in love with you.

I am with the wrong man, and i worry that i am going to spend the rest of my life wondering what if; and being completely unsatisfied with who i am in life, and who i spend it with. I wish i could love you i really could. you are wonderful to me and i know i could live a great life with you; but would it be the right life for me? Would it be what i was meant to live?

There is a reasoning for everything, i'm going to ride this out and hope it all works along with fate; but i know that i will one day have to hurt another. I am so sick of disappointing everyone.

Again, this could work. I love you.